Archive for February, 2009

A Georgia Marriage

From Dylan…

I had married a Succubus but
Didn’t realize till after we’d wed
Emerged a vixen so oleaginous, I
Had to escape from the Demoness’ bed!

For some newlyweds we had quite the dwelling
A place atop a hill with twenty-five rooms
All surrounded by marshland and mire
With an inhabit of her womanly ruse

For leviathans she had quite the beauty
Though a chthonic she looked tanned in the sun
Not carious, at least not on the outside
But on the in she was well over done

She didn’t sleep and had impressive peripheral
So my skedaddle had to avoid the day
I needed desperately the cover of sable
In aide to avoid her covering gaze

In her repast the night I had planned it
Slipped her opiate to addle her limbs
Then used that moment to slip out of the side door
While she collapsed to the parquet languid!

Then came the moment of my anagnorisis
As I tromped through the Buffalo Swamp
The gangly devil who I left behind was
The only woman I ever would want!

So went to return to my darkly lit quarters
Fetch my true love and sorely apologize
But as I lifted my feet from the peat stirred
A snake so deadly when it bit me I died!

The pain was quick but the poison was quicker
I fell in water and was numbed to excess
I could have lived to die with my darling bloodsucker
Instead I died with a snake and regret!

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DylanMayer on February 27th 2009 in Comedy, Poetry, Romance, Tragedy

My Somewhat Less Bloody But No Less Bruised Valentine

A new entry from Shea:

On Valentine’s Day, while some sipped champagne, composed fruitless love letters, or, more accurately, masturbated using homemade lubricant of tears and self-pity, others converged amid gathering storm clouds to exhaust their own romantic frustrations and sexual aggressions in a much different manner. Below is one man’s recollection of what truly happened that day.

–Two thousand, contiguous, nameless faces. A light drizzle. Heavy fog lingers over the Bay. In the distance, storm clouds foreshadow the events to come. Even the women and children have been called to arms. I scan the masses. There are no allegiances here safe what fellowship and love entail, and even these bonds are uncertain when pillows are involved.

–Phone calls from invisible sources. Where are you amid this madness? I’m next to the statue? What statue? Actually it is more of a structure? What structure? Its pretty abstract so I’m not sure what you call it. Nevermind, I’m going to wave my red pillow in the air. Yes, I am aware there are about a hundred red pillows in the air. Mine is the one near the statue. What statue? Actually it’s more of a structure…

–I am alone. Utterly, utterly alone.

– Off in the distance a light thwack of matted goose against corduroy. The sound precipitates a contagious frenzy that circles outward until my hand is no longer my own, raining down upon the button nose and ovular face of a bearded Spaniard in khakis.

–The fray has begun.

–It does not take long for the first feathers to burst from their cotton linings, leaving one to speculate what part their owners played in such an early release. Tricky knife work, or a premature exertion of excessive force? The feathers hang in the air listless, like ash from a volcanic eruption. Some see the airborne threat, and bring masks and bandanas to their mouths. We not previously versed in the terms of this peculiar battle must do without.

–A circle forms. Contained within a man in a chicken hat. “Chicken hat,” screams the crowd. We stop our small conflicts and swarm upon him like moths to the flame. We are the mob and the mob asks no questions. One feels sorry for the individual who thought a chicken hat would suit the festive nature of this battle. One feels sorry for all the hapless souls who brought backpacks, hats, or any clothing accessory easily identified in the sea of flesh and pillows. Panic sets in. I begin to question how my own outfit will be perceived amid the madness. Jeans. Black Shirt. Blue flannel. Wait, how blue? Medium blue. Phew. Facial scars? None of note. Hair? Sweaty and mousy, but not spiked enough to stand above the crowd. Pillow? Red—but, then again, its Valentine’s Day.

–Predictable, little warrior. You are a prisoner to your zealotry, and thus you must swing first. I find my timing. Side step. Grab your pillow between my elbow and ribs. “You cant’ Grab my pillow, it’s a rule,” you say. “Rule, MWUAHAHAHA. There are no rules in pillow fights,” I thrash your rule abiding face with my pillow of anarchy, bringing your perfectly ordered little world to a standstill in a shower of feathers. I watch in ironic horror as you twist my own maniacal laugh back upon me. I am left with a limp, tattered shroud of linen. You hold a mace of hardened goose and a score to settle. You beat me senseless. Without weapon I flee. The ground is littered with the dead. Gutted, sinewy strands of tattered goose lay muddied with footprints, and soiled with spit and sweat. I search the cotton gore for an intact pillow. Please. Please. Success. It will take some time to grow accustomed to the new weight. But I am optimistic, even in these dark times.

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—Amidst a particularly hazy storm of white feathers and the pungent odor of farts, released comfortably and openly in the confidence that no one will ever identify the asshole of origin, two men fight opposite one another. Perceiving a presence behind them they turn, pillows drawn. Their eyes light up. Their embrace is as vicious as the swipes of their pillows. How long has it been since they last saw one another? How many have they lost along the way? The questions do not linger, and the reunion is soon shattered. Love has no place in a pillow fight. Not even on Valentine’s Day.

— Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves. You once taught me a valuable lesson. Relationships based on intense experiences never work. I should have paid heed to your advice. Knocked to the ground with a sideways blow to the face. A defensive reflex, my feet swipe the floor like antennae, feeling for my assailant. I connect with her shins, bringing her down on top of me. Eyes lock, lips meet. We do not part, but instead steal a moment. Our lips are sweaty and the kiss is sour. Yet we hold. “Make out,” I hear, and realize my mistake too late. Pillows guided by anonymous hands pummel us like shoes in a dryer. Is it their jealousy that fuels them? Or is it a painful reminder that one must never let sex obscure the task at hand? Especially when pillows are involved.

—A miracle. Among pillow induced pain and feather related emphysema, I find an old friend. We agree to join forces, fighting back to back. We fight small fish at first. Graduating soon to dual wielders, and similar duos. From the distance lumbers our greatest challenge. He rises high above the crowd like the Eiffel Tower in Paris, or an Ultrasaurus in a new growth forest. “Get the Giant,” cries the masses, and once again we are united by purpose. He has physics on his side. One by one he flattens his assailants like hapless moles in circular arcade prisons. Some attack his thighs. Others attack his abdomen. His blows are powerful, but they exhaust him quickly. Soon he ceases his attack. Was it the combined might of our pillows? Or in the distance did he glimpse more supple prey? Who knows what he sees with his giant’s eyes?

—Thirst consumes me. I meet someone and ask for water. She provides Fresca. It offers no refreshment and leaves a sour taste of over processed grapefruit in my mouth. What is Fresca? What is its purpose for existing? Why does grapefruit need to be carbonated? I spit the remnants about the crowd. The girl follows suit. Our actions enrage a pack of Asians. They swarm upon us, fueled by a sticky, grapefruit flavored vengeance. I look upon Lady Fresca. Her eyes speak of courage and loyalty. We are bonded in this Fresca debacle, she and I. I know then that she will follow me until the very end. I, on the other hand, will have no part in such madness. I grab her by the shoulders and toss her into the hoard. In the ensuing confusion I flee.

—The fray continues, but I will no longer play any part. I reconvene with my friends at long last in front of the statue, which is perhaps more accurately a structure. We share stories of battle, sipping interchangeably upon water and beer. We wonder had this been Lord of the Rings how quickly we would have died, and how we would have met our ends. We settle upon seven seconds, though allowances are made for protagonists.

—I arrive home. I go on to cap the night in true warrior fashion—with beer and pizza, though to me it tastes like mead and mutton. I revel in my moments of glory, and toast to the fallen. Finally, returning at long last to my chambers, I put the day to rest in a most fitting manner: I lay down my weapon, and allow it at last to fulfill its intended purpose.

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SheaOneill on February 24th 2009 in Comedy, Essay, Romance, Uncategorized

send me dead flowers by the mail - pt ii

And the more he thought, the quicker he thought, and the quicker he thought, the sooner he became aware of himself, and the sooner he became aware, the more he thought about his bland outfit, and the more he thought of that, the faster he walked, until he came but a step from colliding into the counter and ball rack behind the lanes. In a sudden and swift move, graceful as his bowling stroke, he slid out of the way, narrowly avoiding the embarrassing scene of spilling water on himself and ruining this moment and his entire month hence.

Approaching the table in front of his lane, he stole one more glance and saw that her eyes remained facing his direction.

He set his cups down, inhaled deeply, but through his nose. He did not want her to see his skittish preparation. He faced her. His cell phone - which lay on the table - rang. He turned, saw his sister’s name on the display screen and nearly collapsed from sickness. He hit the silence key. Avoiding his sister was not a scenario he was unfamiliar with. When he looked up, the woman tilted her head bashfully, and manufactured a coy smile. He felt reinvigorated and set down the phone.

He took a step, only to hear the phone ring, yet again. This time, however, it was his work. And this time, he had to support himself on the table, because he truly thought he might collapse. He promptly silenced it, and without a moment’s hesitation, in a rare feat of spontaneity, walked over to her.

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She took notice, and immediately sat at attention, rapidly deciding how she would react to the upcoming exchange. Computing dozens of greeting scenarios and the appropriate response to each at computer-like speed, and each one unique, based on how he would prompt her.

When Eric finally did reach his new destination, he was unable to say anything. He’d thought so much about his phone and summoning the courage to just walk there, what he would do once he arrived eluded him. So he said, “Hi.” And she, shocked at his choice, merely returned with, “Hi.” Ken watched from the front desk, cautiously, unobtrusively, but intently.  Eric bounced lightly and fearfully on the balls of his feet, slid his hands into his pockets, lowered his head, and after a moment, the two could manage to produce little more than a mutually nervous laugh.

She was even more beautiful, to him, at such a short distance: Her modest, yet slender stature, the curve of her hips, the loose fitting knitted sweater, which hung over her nervously contorted fists, and her flowing hair made him weak. He’d forgotten about his parents, and his sister’s call, and his job, and all the choices he’d made, that up until this point, had led him down a most undesirable path. He’d also forgotten how to speak.

empty_room_by_m0nni-1

In the distance, Eric’s phone rang, yet again, and the echo of that electronic ringtone ran up his spine like a platoon of red ants. She glanced over his shoulder and asked if he should take that. Before he could warmly dismiss it, a pile of energetic youngsters plowed through the door of the alley. Eric and the woman shifted their attention to the unstoppable force heading their way.

They’d both wanted a distraction, but neither of the two they were presented with. “Hey Miss. Donaldson!” Yelled a small boy who led the pack towards the woman. “I should,” “-Right, so should I,” they said. They both knew the moment was gone. The difference? The woman thought it was just this moment, but Eric, he knew it was the only moment.

Back at his lane, he felt a cold sweat, and an uncontrollable shudder of his hands. He picked up the phone to see that in fact his sister had called again. The shudder took control of his entire body. Not externally visible, but internally debilitating. He placed the phone down, though he’d wanted to slam it. He picked up his ball. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This was still his time; his time to escape, however short it was.

He balanced, approached, and like all the other times: Down, forward, slide, release, and pop up. His back leg kicked up, with the faintest bit of life and charisma as the ball rolled its way down the lane. And after a perfect path, followed by perfect contact, 60 feet away, stood one pin- the 10-pin- in the corner, alone amongst the black behind it.

But, being as rigidly stable and uncompromising in the release of his emotions as he was, he just spun slowly on the heels of his plain white sneakers, grimaced slightly and clenched his fist for no more than a moment before releasing. He repeated the process, and threw a ball, which shot down the lane harder than he normally threw it- the spin, less graceful.

The lane sensed this change, and reacted accordingly. The ball twisted at the last moment, and missed the pin. Missed the spare; missed his chance. His phone rang again. The ball returned; he had nine frames remaining and three games after those frames. He silenced his phone, picked up his ball and placed it in his bag. He wiped the oily grease from his fingers onto his jeans, grabbed his coat with the other hand, and walked out.

He made eye contact with no one as he left. Not Ken and not the children and certainly not the woman. He stepped outside, and was struck with a breath of cool, but piercing wind. He thought about the long hours, the never-ending days, and the years that had rolled by like a ball on it’s way to the pins, only to twist just a bit too much and strike nothing but the black tarp.

He thought about the strikes, the spares, the splits, and the gutters. All those frames, all these games, all this time without memories- where had they gone? But he would remember today. bowling-pin-424He stood outside the alley, alone in the wind, in his horribly bland and self-loathing outfit: a royal blue collared shirt tucked into a black denim pair of jeans over white sneakers. And back in the alley, in the furthest corner of the furthest lane, stood the 10th pin.

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Stockton Borealis on February 22nd 2009 in Fiction, Romance, Short Story, Tragedy

Send Me dead flowers by the mail: pt I

It was 4:45, and Eric had skipped out of work a few minutes early. This wasn’t a problem anymore. He’d spent 10 years in the same office, learning the same people’s tendencies. He knew Susan always had a cigarette at 4:35, and stayed outside, pretending to talk on the phone till 4:50, at which point she would return and start packing her things. He knew all of their vices. He did nothing with them, but use them as a means to avoid them. Ducking out was no longer more difficult than slipping in 10 minutes late from his lunch break. He could probably stretch it to an hour.

He despised the outfit he’d chosen to wear today: a royal blue collared shirt tucked into a black denim pair of jeans over white sneakers. It was such a bland and self-loathing outfit. He despised attention being brought on him. It didn’t even match.

He’d arrived a time in his life where pleasures were a dying breed. Natural selection was taking over, and in the form of banalities and inconveniences. Almost everything was at this point- an inconvenience. There was his sister. He could hardly stomach the bemoaning scene - where she pried for money and support - that was lunch on Wednesdays. He watched the History channel, although he wasn’t particularly interested in it. But he didn’t want to be included. News, sports, celebrity scandal- he wanted nothing to do with it.

He stopped trying to meet women, or more accurately avoided them, as well- turned off to the whole concept of marriage after spending his childhood absorbing the noise of his bickering parents, and most of his young adulthood trying not to hear the shouts from what was once a marriage, turned adversarial co-habitation.
harlequinduck
Standing alone, the only sounds in the alley were the gears churning on the ball return. The ball travels down the lane, up the return ramp and back to his hands- Time and time again; too repetitive to remember. Just an image. He lined up his shot, balanced his weight and approached with a smooth, upbeat stride reminiscent of a dance step. Down, forward, slide, release, pop up. His back leg kicked up behind, with the faintest bit of life and charisma, as the ball rolled its way down the lane. It was poetry in motion, but he never thought of it that way. The sport had become his escapist pleasure, but he hardly allowed it to be even that.

The ball glided along the second arrow from the right, rotating forward and diagonally on its axis toward the front pin, just off center and it followed the exact path he’d aimed for. The ball struck the pins just as he had planned, and evaporating in front of the ball was each pin, with the exception of one. He’d thrown a perfect ball and received imperfect results. He stared at the 10th pin, alone in the far corner of the lane. It should have fallen with the others; it should have been a strike.

But, being as rigidly stable and uncompromising in the release of his emotions as he was, he just spun slowly on the heels of his plain white sneakers, grimaced slightly - certainly not enough for anyone who wasn’t watching to take notice of - and waited for the ball to spit itself back out the return and into his hands. The result was almost as he expected. Of course he wouldn’t get the strike. He couldn’t get a break in any other moment of the last 10 years of his life, he thought, why would he get one in bowling? And had he gotten a strike, it was but a mere confirmation of what he knew should of happened. There was no pleasure, either way. If he couldn’t win, he’d at least be satisfying with predicting that he would fail, unfairly. Feeling justified, he picked up the spare and waited for the next frame. He’d already forgotten the last one.

After the game, he approached Ken, the establishment’s owner and only employee. A rigid business man; willing to purchase or spend capital on what the old fashioned and lifeless alley needed: snack machines, electronic dart boards, an updated food stand, but intransigent on spending a cent more than necessary. Before attending to Eric, Ken ordered a woman, who just entered the building that she’d have to throw her bottle of soda out. “We have soda machines, if you’re thirsty.” Eric gazed at the door, knowing kids were to follow this woman, and his own private lane amongst the beautifully desolate alley was moments away from being intruded upon in the crudest of fashions.
lonely_path_by_blink001
Ken turned to Eric, knowing why he was at the desk, and went straight to the bar. He’d always purchased a pitcher of water, for one dollar, as well. The days were getting longer. Each minute dragged. The weeks felt like they would never end, but conversely Eric also felt that so many years had escaped him, and faster than the pins fall upon contact. Eric hadn’t had any contact in some time.

Each day at the alley was beginning to feel that way. The games were long and grueling, and by the end, it felt as if he’d never even started. Ken returned, not with a pitcher, but with two plastic cups of water, and charged Eric nothing. Eric nodded his head and returned to his lane, a cup in each hand. Ken is a rigid businessman.

As he walked, he turned his head toward the door again, which had yet to have rowdy children burst through. He couldn’t stand children. He couldn’t even remember what it was like when he was one. Was he ever one? Rotating his head back towards his destination, he and the woman, who now sat, embittered and thirsty, met stares. He tried to divert his gaze, casually, but something in his neck kept him from turning.

She wasn’t particularly beautiful, plain but pleasant. Her hair, however, was stunning. It was long, rich, and flowed down her neck, around her shoulders, and dangled delicately and deliberately off her back. In the midst of the inauspicious attempt to be inconspicuous, he noticed that she too, was not turning her head, aimlessly staring at the ceiling, or pretending to find something to occupy her attention until Eric had looked away. 

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Decidedly more curious, he saw that she unmistakably smiled at him. What was this happening? Could this be one of those real moments that he’d only seen on screen or heard told time and time again by a burdensome colleague? When you avoid people, you rarely see their eyes, or their smiles, or their hair. You see faces, and fabric, all forgotten by the mind as quickly as it was processed and before you realize it, you haven’t seen a person in years. But this time, he saw a woman.

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Stockton Borealis on February 20th 2009 in Fiction, Romance, Short Story, Tragedy, Uncategorized

Quimson’s Exotic

Hello all, here’s the latest submission from Dylan. Enjoy…

Quimson’s exotic stories of romance were always a source of great entertainment. He was raised on the classic tales of love. The plays, the poems. The films, novels, and songs. And his life, he liked to think, was a reflection of those mediums.casablanca

Versed in all forms, he was able to summon up lines from the great poets, it would seem, without any sort of mental pause. Where others found themselves adrift in a sea of thoughts and feelings they could not explain, Quimson’s speech came across as both effortless and precise. His words came out, not as though he had thought of them, but as if they had sought out his mouth specifically. Like the pipes in his throat were the most divine gateway to speech an utterance could hope for, and so it was there they flocked.

He believed in, and could understand nothing but, great passion.

Among all the attributes he carried, people would first take note of how stout a boy he was, with attire consisting mainly of sweaters and an earflap hat, in which he could be seen regardless of season or setting.

After school, atop an overturned chicken crate, Quimson would spin stories of love’s triumph to a mass of his classmates. Children, held suspended from their televisions and radios by one boy’s histrionic telling of a summer courting, or of two lovers rend by society or wartimes. Stories where hardship is endured and characters discover strength through love. Sometimes the love was reckless, sometimes it was mad, but always it was pure.

Often the children had questions. Often the children were not children at all but young adults much older than Quimson himself.

He would address their concerns calmly and warmly, settling their worries by citing Cummings, Shakespeare, Frost, and Dickinson when appropriate.

But despite all the times he had helped the public deal with the woes of the heart, they would always return with new dilemmas and, frequently, new loves altogether. As much as Quimson tried to mirror his life with the romance in his books and plays, his peers seemed to live a carefree existence filled with shallow, frivolous coquetries.

Quimson was not like them. His heart was devoted to Monique - a girl he spent an all too short spring in the company of many years ago. Their initial paths crossed during a year which, to lovelorn Quimson, isn’t remembered by a number but by the event – “The Spring of Monique.” A daughter of friends who would imbibe with Quimson’s parents, Monique was a thin-armed girl, sleek and slender, who would squat in mud for long stretches of time, as was the tendency at the age. During these play dates arranged by their parents, Quimson was captivated fully and found his eyes lingering on her so long he’d forget his mouth altogether, letting it droop toward his chest. But his Monique showed no signs of noticing.kids

At the close of the spring, as school let out, Monique was whisked away from Quimson. Her father had been offered a new job and so the family of three moved. To where, Quimson did not know.

For that summer, and all the seasons since, Quimson writhed over her absence. Although brief, he declared his time with Monique to be the buds of a romance destined to follow him throughout the rest of his existence. Once a month he would compose a letter to her, opening it with “Dearest Monique” and then stating his continuing adoration for her before the eventual close - “Truly yours…”

Knowing no address, he would rely on the wings of pigeons, or the waves of a nearby creek to deliver the message to her hands.

Quimson composed the letters as he did all his writings, by candlelight, in cursive, using a feather and ink. For school, sometimes professors would make a dire request for type, in which case Quimson had an old typewriter. It was a gift from his grandmother. A number of the keys had the tendency of sticking, but Quimson strongly believed in believing and modern day “advancements,” he felt, alienated people of this duty. Everything was too easy for everyone and true work, he believed, true passion, true love, was a rare sight nowadays.

This thought had been forming in his mind for some time but it invaded his home in the summer of his thirteenth year, before he was to enter the eighth grade. He was in his room when from down the stairs, through his wall, the voices of his parents found the canal of his ear.

He was working diligently on a paper of little importance, lit by a skinny wax candle, feather tip in hand, when he heard the bitter bellow of the word “divorce.” It had sought him out. It found him, as many other words had, and Quimson began to think – the world may very well be heading in the wrong direction.

He felt then, more then ever, the frustration of everyone around him not taking love seriously.

Quimson was able to rely on the satisfaction of knowing his life was based on a larger, a more grand idea of romance. If his life were to be viewed by a writer, there would be the saga of Monique - two young lovers, separated in their youth. Quimson knew that he would go about his life always thinking of her, and she would go about hers thinking of him, then many years down the road they would reunite under unlikely circumstances with a passionate embrace.

But not yet.

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DylanMayer on February 17th 2009 in Fiction, Romance, Short Story

We’re only making plans for nigel

We have a couple new stories coming in the near future, so in the mean time, we’ll give your eyes a breather and present friend’s sites and work part 2.

This post will be dedicated to music.

“Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is THE BEST…”

The Lonely Veterinarian - By Mingione and Proietto

Here are some more of Mingione’s solo works - The guy can Noodle.

Next we have: “With Soda” - The Quiet

For more catchy as a cold beats - visit “the quiet.” Kid is precocious.

And: Marla’s stop-motion animation project.

Vivo - Fobia - Music Video by Marla

Finally, Marla’s follow up: Siempre - by: La Ley

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Stockton Borealis on February 15th 2009 in Audio, Visual

Hooray for Shea!

n13801944_30261779_4082Recently, we published Shea’s time travel tale “Past and Present Knights.” Shea also submitted his story to a Literary Magazine “Flask and Pen” who holds an annual short story competition. We’re proud to announce that he received a 3rd Place Honorable Mention recognition.

Now, while honorable mention seems like a pedestrian accomplishment to some, allow me to elucidate the gravity of this feat Shea has attained.

1. There were over 1 Billion Entries in this contest.
2. Notable writers who submitted to this contest, and did not receive Honorable Mentions include:
*William Faulkner
*Norman Mailer
*Dan Brown
*Dante Alighieri
*Josh Schwartz
3. And 999,999,991 other Losers like them.

So - check out his story and revel in the quirky story of revenge and movies.

Congrats Shea.

Here is the link:
http://flaskandpen.com/

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Stockton Borealis on February 15th 2009 in Uncategorized

Past and Present Knights Pt. ii

It’s a pleasure to present Part Deux of Shea’s harrowing tale of time travel…

As we have touched briefly upon its potential, let us pause for a moment to reflect upon Time. There are those who say Time is like casting a stone into a pond and watching the ripples circle outward. Sometimes this is the case. But mostly, Time is like a handful of pebbles strewn across a lake, with each pebble creating its own tiny ripple. The ripples scatter, directionless. Sometimes they flow into one another; sometimes they ebb into nothingness.

One pebble is a woman.

There is nothing special about her as far as appearances go. She looks as any plain faced, 20 something, might look in 1970’s Pondicherry—familiar.

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Each day at 3 o’clock she would pass a small, family owned-café in the northwest section of town. Each day there would sit a man reading a book in the corner. The man was Indian, but with a foreign quality about him, and not particularly just that he was from another country, but like he was from an entirely different kind of place. At the same time he felt so familiar. It was almost as if he were pleading to tell her a story: a story that by some peculiar design featured only her.

Still, their days were spent in silence. Try as she would to engage his attention, he never once looked up from his book.

The man is another pebble. The man is Manoj Vindalu.

Though he departed from Dunville with a plan, Manoj arrived in 1970 Pondicherry without the faintest idea of how to execute it. He hadn’t a clue where to find M Knight’s future mother. Worse yet, he had no idea when the time of conception was, and could not be sure that, even if he found her, the genetic miracle of life was not already stewing within her uterus.

Manoj decided that his first plan of action would be to use the time machine as a sort of research device to uncover the moment when the two lovers first met. It should have taken months (or years depending on how you look at it) and yet he stumbled almost instantly upon a street corner where they shared their first kiss. Upon further investigation, he was fortunate enough to overhear them discussing the details of the day they first met. He went back in time again and followed her to the meeting. He found it at a small, family owned café in the northwest section of town.

Finding two specific souls in the bottomless abyss of time? Learning further the exact date of their meeting? Why Manoj never thought to reflect upon this wave of good luck is uncertain. Though it is often the tragedy of the unwise to mistake fate for fortune, as he would soon come to understand.

After ascertaining the details of their meeting, he traveled innumerably to the past of M Knight’s future mother. He made periodic appearances throughout her life, positioning himself in places where their eyes would meet, sometimes only for an instant. His eyes would become a motif that defined her life. His eyes would be the dream she unconsciously sought in her waking hours. He would become her perpetual déjà vu. Once he was certain that his eyes would never be forgotten, he traveled to the small, family owned-café in the northwest section of town. There he waited three weeks, each day feeling her gaze hot upon his neck.

Then came the day of the fated meeting. Everything played out as normal: M Knight’s future mother was on track to meet her one-time future husband. But, at the precise moment when the eyes of her one-time future husband looked forward, hers instinctively looked right—to Manoj in the café. And there, for the first time in three weeks, she met his eyes. They were the eyes of her dreams. They were eyes that reflected her past. They were eyes that had seen time. And with no greater passing than any of the other innumerable, shifting bodies, her one-time future husband continued on his way, unaware as she that their shared future had been struck from existence with the swiftness of a single quill stroke.
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Manoj offered her a seat, though he could scarcely understand why. He had already averted fate. His task was finished. He had assured that M. Knight could not possibly be conceived. He had thwarted their meeting, and in a city of millions, no one gets a second chance at something like that. Perhaps it was the intoxicating power of his success, or the sweet aroma of coconut milk that swam from her pores, but he found himself wishing to pursue his advances further. He had bested his rival. Now he would taste the spoils.

Manoj never had much skill with women. But he wouldn’t need any for this. The consequences of his meddling with her past had ensured that she would never want for another as long as she lived. On a tattered, single mattress, within the walls of a small inn, they engaged in carnal congress with a passion that can only be exhibited by lovers who have seen time, and returned to write its designs upon one another in their sweat.

Later, Manoj rose in the moonlight and stared at the woman whose womb now lay dormant. He paused for a moment of reflection. He was 8,000 miles and 40 years from the only life that he knew. What was he in the future but a cranky, middle-aged video store clerk, with a now-complete vendetta against a prominent Hollywood director? In the now he was a time traveler. He was a man with knowledge of the future. Knowledge he could use to make him a very rich man. And so he fled without so much as a fare-thee well, pawned the device, and booked passage to America.

Manoj could not see the grand lake of Time. If he could he would have seen that the many ripples caused by the pebbles he had strewn were slowly merging into one. And though many interesting things happened to Manoj in America, nothing of true merit occurred until nine years later. He was on a stroll through Fairmount Park when he bumped into his Indian mistress of nine years past. It was awkward. But it was nothing compared to what he felt when she introduced a small child, scarcely older than eight: the product of their quieted lust.

How does a penguin know her child? How does a bird known the passage south only just being born? Is it in the blood? Is it in the genes? Or is it in the eyes? Manoj met the frightened gaze and he saw familiar eyes—eyes that had seen time. And when the revelation came, it did not come like surf upon a beach, but like waves upon sharp rocks.

There, in a park in Philadelphia, were the eyes of the man who would go on to create the greatest atrocities known to modern cinema. The very man Manoj had set out to destroy so long ago had been born from the fruits of his own lust. Was it always destined to be like this? We do not know. All we know is that Time is pebbles strewn across a lake. And no matter how many ripples circle outward in untold directions, they all settle in the end.

Manoj fled. He felt the hands of madness begin to claw at him, and he knew it was only a matter of time before they would pull him asunder. Unless…

Unless Milo! If Milo knew the truth perhaps he could avert such an undeserved fate. But how would he contact a man 30 years in the future? Something came to him, an idea he had seen in Back to the Future Part II. He would send a letter to Milo. He would recount every vivid detail of his journey. Milo would learn from his mistakes and then, only then, could he save Manoj.
He ran to the nearest pharmacy and bought paper, envelops, a pen, and Sitcky’s Quick Bonding Glue: guaranteed to last 30 years. He scribbled furiously, penning letters barely more legible than Sanskrit. He closed the letter and applied a glob of glue to the back. He ran to the nearest mailbox, opened it, and glued it beneath the lid. With any luck the envelope would survive the 30 advertised years before falling in the appropriate time period. It was a long shot. All he could do was wait.

Against all odds, the plan worked. The letter fell a little more than a week or so after the day Manoj had first begun his journey through time. It fell among similar parcels, differentiated only by the tawny coloring it had accumulated over the years. It was retrieved by the mailman and delivered to the home of the intended recipient. And yet, not all went according to plan.

Manoj had peeked so far into his own past that he had forgotten entirely about the future—more specifically, Milo’s future. He and Manoj may have shared drastically different geography, but they still inhabited the same timeline.

So on that fateful day as the credits began to roll and Manoj activated the device, Milo had turned right to offer him some popcorn. As he extended a handful, he saw Manoj disappear into nothingness. Milo screamed inconsolably. He made such a ruckus that he was arrested. He continued to scream all the way to the police department. He screamed past his holding cell and into the office of a psychiatric evaluator. He screamed at every turn in the brief, albeit windy, road that led him to be confined within The Montgomery County Psychiatric Hospital. Perhaps he screamed out of horror from seeing his friend vanish. Perhaps because he could not stomach the fact that time travel was nothing more elaborate than the liberal application of glue to circuitry.

The incident aroused the attention of many. Bad popcorn some said. Too much pornography said others. It also attracted the attention of a 40 something movie director with a strong affinity for such mysteries. The man spent his evenings trolling various newspapers in search of critics who reviewed his movies favorably. He never found any. But what he did find while browsing through a supermarket tabloid he had purchased in the hopes of finding a favorable review, was a story about an individual who claimed his best friend disappeared into thin air during a recent screening of The Happening. He decided it was a story worth investigating.

So he went to the man’s home and talked to his mother. She told him her son had been committed and was not allowed visitors for the first 50 days. When the man inquired further about the incident she left the room. She returned with a tawny colored envelope. The envelope had arrived a week after the incident. It was addressed from the man who Milo claimed disappeared. Stranger yet was that no one had seen that man since. She had kept the letter out of fear. She gave it to the man at her doorstep for the same reason.

He bid farewell and hailed a taxi. In the backseat he opened the letter and read its contents. He became entranced in a story that both explored and transcended Time. It was a Greek tragedy; it was an exploration in science fiction. Its protagonist was raw. He even saw the potential for a subplot of redemption in the rewrite. As the cab pulled into his driveway, he produced a twenty for the driver and a cell phone for himself. Dialing a number he dialed once a year, he heard a voice click on the other end; and he spoke.

“Hello Mike, its me, M Knight. I’ve just had the best idea for my next film.”

So comes to rest another tragic tale about a man who thought himself the better of Time. But Time is not a foe to be conquered, or a trial to be endured. Time is pebbles strewn across a lake. And whether Time really is a thing, an abstraction, or a cosmic seamstress weaving tapestries of fate by celestial candlelight, one thing is certain: it sure can spin a good yarn.
nooooo

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SheaOneill on February 13th 2009 in Comedy, Fiction, Sci-Fi, Short Story

Past and Present Knights Part I

We’ve got contributor #2, folks. The leather-foot, scatterbrained, and immensely clever- Shea O’Neill. He is single, bearded, and author of the kerouacian (care-OH-whack-ee-n) blog ‘Northwest Excursion.’

Below is part one of his quirky time travel saga. Enjoy:

It did not surprise Milo Stampton, repudiated best friend of Manoj Vindalu, when Manoj burst into his apartment one Friday afternoon with a solution to the “M Knight problem.” Nor did it confound his sensibilities that the “solution” appeared to be a shoebox, wherein wires and circuits co-mingled in a pool of Elmer’s Glue. It fazed him little when Manoj called the box a time machine; less when he explained the mechanics: it would encapsulate him within a pan-dimensional, time-neutral bubble, allowing him to transport instantaneously while time continued as normal outside. His plan was easily deducible: use the machine to fast-forward to the twist endings in M. Knight’s movies.

Considering Manoj’s zealotry, single mindedness, and weekend propensity for glue huffing, it all made perfect sense. Except for the fact that Manoj, an often solitary man, invited Milo to the device’s inauguration. This was truly surprising.

They traveled together to the movie theatre, though Milo, admittedly, went only to ridicule. At the concession stand Milo bought a large tub of popcorn. Manoj refused concessions, reminding Milo that “he won’t need snacks where he’s going.” They filed into their seats, nodding or sneering accordingly throughout the previews. The credits silenced the crowd. Taking his cue, Manoj closed his eyes and activated the device.

He awoke to find himself staring once again at the opening credits. Defeated, he tossed the device among fallen popcorn kernels and half chewed bubblegum. It appeared Milo had been right all along and that one cannot deconstruct the mysteries of time travel using wires and glue. Perhaps next time he would use rubber cement instead. He turned to congratulate Milo. In his place he found an older gentlemen, ashen white, waving his hands and stuttering “G-G-Ghost.”

It would be far too convenient to construe the man’s outburst as just another “senior moment.” The man is, or rather was—as these events would surely precipitate a downfall in his sanity—a rather competent and upstanding citizen. But what other conclusion could he possibly draw? He had, after all, been minding his own businesses, palming a rather ambitious handful of popcorn, when an Indian man appeared out of the Ether and plopped into the seat beside him.

While hovering beyond the earth in his pan-dimensional, time neutral bubble, Manoj forgot the fact that the Earth would continue to turn on its normal 24-hour rotation, spinning at an impressive 800 mph below. And so, two hours later, the geographic location from which he had originated was no longer the geographic location in which he re-emerged. He resurfaced two hours West in a small midwestern town called Dunville. The true miracle was that he had somehow managed to reappear inside another movie theatre showing the same film he had attempted to avert two hours and 1,600 miles earlier.

Manoj fled the escalating awkwardness in search of a bus station. Nearing the depot he heard a whisper from an adjacent alleyway. Curiosity piqued, he slinked into the darkness. There he found a man cloaked in black.

“Looking for some time?” the man asked.

Manoj, confused and still distraught over his failed experiment, decided to inquire further into what the man meant by time. Most likely he was some black market clock salesman. Though Manoj clung to hope that just maybe he was selling some thyme, which would go nicely with the stew Manoj planned to cook later that evening.

“Time,” the man repeated. “The Great Journey. Miss Scary Plane. The Relevancy Factor. The STC. Time Travel.”

“You mean to tell me,” Manoj replied skeptically, “that you are peddling time travel in the back alley of a small midwestern town? How do I know this is not a hoax?”

“You’ll just have to trust me the same way you trusted Marty Coopersmith to sell you an official early release copy of Cloverfield, instead of some cheap bootleg,” he answered, checking over each shoulder for whatever authorities might police against illegal time dealing.

Manoj then concluded that no stranger could possibly know such personal information unless they had traveled back in time to obtain it.

And so perhaps it was the curious name drop. Or perhaps it is because a bootleg time travel device turned out to be much cheaper than a bus ticket back to Philadelphia. But Manoj decided to make a deal.

“So where will you be going, forward or backward?” the man asked, opening his coat to reveal a colorful assortment of trinkets and mechanical devices, all of which hummed at a deep and unsettling frequency. Manoj’s instincts told him to say forward, but he caught his tongue. Why continue to go forward when there would always be another movie theatre just beyond the horizon? Why run a race he could not win? Why not just go back to the beginning and rig the race in his favor?

He would travel backward to the curry swept bazaars of 1970’s Pondicherry, India. He would find the parents of M Knight. He would thwart their love. And once and for all he would avert the ill-fated conception of the man responsible for cinematic holocaust.

“I’ll take an order of the past,” Manoj said, smiling wryly. “And make it to go.” End Part I.

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SheaOneill on February 11th 2009 in Fiction, Sci-Fi, Short Story, Uncategorized

A Note To Writers

Hello,

I would like to talk briefly about the writing process…

The story,  scenery,  characters,  themes, and the tone are vital organs to the vast majority of stories in any medium. Anton Chekhov once said, “Don’t tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass.” Details, and evocative images, are what lifts a story off the ground and into our, imaginations. Having a great idea, with vivd characters, and an elusive plot are not the only components to great story telling. You unearth what it is you want to say, and then you must determine, how to say it.

And that’s the problem I’ve encountered recently; I”ve been coming to grips with the fact that I don’t have the command over the English language; and its rules, the way I would like two. Its so important to implement the proper punctuation in the proper places… The fluidity, at, which your writing will be read by someone, rests wholly-on your ability to annuncinate, and then punctunate your thoughts?

The beauty of this challenge, is that there is no 1 rule. Hemingway; used commas, infrequently, and wrote, very, terse prose. Nietzsche would write a whole page that was one sentence. An’d Cor-mac McCarthy’s writing’s, specifically/ “No Country For Old Men” hasn’t got nearly any apostrophe’s; semicolons’ at all!1

So, as I stated, I’ve encountered the problem, of: How should i 4matt my writings? I, recently! Bought THIS BOOK, and I think it has had a very positive affect, on, the way I convey my thoughts,

I definately want too recomennd, it, to all writer’s, who are searching- themselves, and try-ing to find they’re inside voice and there style(

Wheel all be benefactors as the residualult. So keap rite-ing!

-stockton

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Stockton Borealis on February 8th 2009 in Comedy, Essay